I am
in a friendship right now that is very complicated.
I have been hanging out with him for a very long time. We talked on the phone, online and in person every day for several months.
We both get jealous of each other being with a potential other person and his body language signifies that he likes me more than a friend.
All my friends and his friends all say that he acts as though there is feelings between us that we don't even have to say anything but they know we have a "connection."
He centers all his activities on what I do every weekend and does everything that every guy will do when they like someone more than a friend.
Problem is he tells everyone that asks him what is going on that we are just friends and that's all he sees me as.
I have, during this time, fallen in love with him.
I don't want to lose our friendship but I want to be with him more than just a friend!
What am I missing?
The "Friend"
Dear "Friend"
Unfortunately, this is a very common situation and I really don't know what's holding your "friend" back.
You don't tell me anything about his background so I have no way of knowing whether he has been burned in an earlier relationship which is making him phobic about entering into a new one.
One thing you can do is not be so available.
Why should he ask you out when he can see you anytime he wants to?
My advice would be to start seeing other people and when he calls, occasionally tell him you're busy or going out.
Maybe that will snap him out of the "we're just friends" routine.
The way it is now, why should he make a move when he has you anyway?
I also think it would be wise for you to take a good hard look at his relationship history to try to understand what is really holding him back.
Has he had other girlfriends and, if so, what has happened?
Once you do that, you will know if, in fact, he is really relationship material anyway.
Maybe friendship is all he can do right now.
The bottom line is you need to take care of you. He may be jealous and possessive but unless he steps up to the plate, what do you really have?
By the way, I would definitely let him make the first move.
He's scared of something and he has to deal with whatever that is before he would be ready for anything deeper.
I have been hanging out with him for a very long time. We talked on the phone, online and in person every day for several months.
We both get jealous of each other being with a potential other person and his body language signifies that he likes me more than a friend.
All my friends and his friends all say that he acts as though there is feelings between us that we don't even have to say anything but they know we have a "connection."
He centers all his activities on what I do every weekend and does everything that every guy will do when they like someone more than a friend.
Problem is he tells everyone that asks him what is going on that we are just friends and that's all he sees me as.
I have, during this time, fallen in love with him.
I don't want to lose our friendship but I want to be with him more than just a friend!
What am I missing?
The "Friend"
Dear "Friend"
Unfortunately, this is a very common situation and I really don't know what's holding your "friend" back.
You don't tell me anything about his background so I have no way of knowing whether he has been burned in an earlier relationship which is making him phobic about entering into a new one.
One thing you can do is not be so available.
Why should he ask you out when he can see you anytime he wants to?
My advice would be to start seeing other people and when he calls, occasionally tell him you're busy or going out.
Maybe that will snap him out of the "we're just friends" routine.
The way it is now, why should he make a move when he has you anyway?
I also think it would be wise for you to take a good hard look at his relationship history to try to understand what is really holding him back.
Has he had other girlfriends and, if so, what has happened?
Once you do that, you will know if, in fact, he is really relationship material anyway.
Maybe friendship is all he can do right now.
The bottom line is you need to take care of you. He may be jealous and possessive but unless he steps up to the plate, what do you really have?
By the way, I would definitely let him make the first move.
He's scared of something and he has to deal with whatever that is before he would be ready for anything deeper.
No comments:
Post a Comment